January 18th, 2007
Lure
When I grow up I want to be a sailboat, or a bilge pump. This one time when I was a puppy, I fell over some shoes and smashed my nose on my food bowl, then I had the hiccups, and downloaded porn. I can fit a flute in my nostril and pour skittles through the mouth hole thingy. They go right down into my tummy. Wanna play ninja turtles? Sometimes I like to spin in circles and quote Ghandi… does that make me weird?


(4 votes, average: 4.75 out of 5)
February 6th, 2008 at 11:18 pm
this is my favorite rant EVER.
June 29th, 2008 at 4:36 pm
You have summed up my life. My, that was easy.